|Beware the Dog|
|2002-12-21 || Boring|
I promised myself that I would write atleast once a week ... so I don't forget how to write and so that I don't bottle too much of myself up inside me .. stressing and dying and forgetting who I am.
I see that there are a few people reading and I wish that I had the technology to make new pages and design the way that I used to. I miss that part of this more than anything.
My boyfriend's ex-girlfriend is going to be in town for the holidays and two nights ago he asked, did I want to see her? Would I care if she came over? And the smugness in his voice, that look on his face. It's not even their relationship that makes me jealous. It's that she is pretty and successful and lives alone in New York - which is a huge mark of single success - and is moving to Rio and can do what she wants and doesn't live with some guy and have two dogs that means that she can't do anything, living paycheck to paycheck like me.
I love my life and when I calculate what I do and what I do do now, I like who I am. I love that I work at a non-profit and that I volunteer, that I chose a nice boy to move in with and I love the dogs etc. Sometimes people tell me these stories of things that they have done and I feel so boring.